I remember that feeling all too well, the feeling you physically won’t be able to exist without him in your life. Not only that, breaking through that feeling of “I won’t be able to survive without him” and then discovering that you can will make you realize how strong you are, and as a result, will help build your self-esteem and give you that amazing “I can get through anything” feeling.

Another reason this rule is so important is because if a relationship didn’t work, then it won’t begin to work unless something significant changes, and change takes time.

And wanting something doesn’t mean it’s good for you.

If you get back together because you miss him or feel like you can’t live without him or you don’t want to be alone, then you are setting yourself up to circle back to exactly where you are right now, in relationship no-man’s-land.

Missing someone doesn’t mean you’re supposed to be with that person.

It takes time to peel back those layers, get to the core of that pain, and heal. If he’s the right guy for you he’ll be back, and if he’s not, then you’ll find someone who is.

The no contact rule is for you; remember that first and foremost. I know that this can feel impossible, especially if you’re fresh out of a relationship. In the meantime, you need to learn to stand on your own two feet without him there to support you, and it can be done.

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It doesn’t matter how abundantly clear it is that the relationship isn’t going to last, they keep jumping back into the toxic waters and hoping this time they won’t get wet.