The rules of dating my daughter
In case you missed the February 18 blog or would just like to refresh yourself, go ahead and click HERE to see it again.
Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. When my Gulf War Syndrome starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home.
I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight.
Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots.
Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants three sizes too small, and I will not object.
The concept of a Dad issuing his ground rules for dating his daughter seemed to unite the entire tribe of Fathers!
I’m guessing those rules are what all of us have been thinking but didn’t think we could actually ever say it.Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been.Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka – zipped up to her throat. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, all-seeing, merciless god of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a helo coming in over a Wadi near Baghdad.If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips.This light hearted shirt is bringing thousands of Dads further into the important conversation of their role with their daughter. , I wrote a funny little blog about the “rules for dating my daughter.” I chuckled as I wrote it and never dreamed how much buzz it would receive.